Body language is not only powerful, it's usually reliable, too. Body language isn't completely reliable if the person expressing it knows how to manipulate it well. Consider the poker player who has perfected their body language to the point that the other players don't see their "tells."
Body language comes through most of the time whether you intend to reveal it or not. However, you need to be careful when assessing someone else's body language. What means one thing to one person might mean something entirely different to someone else.
Body Language Examples
The following body language examples are common. It's usually easy to discern their meaning once you've learned them.
1. Arms Crossed Across The Chest
Sitting or standing with your arms crossed across your chest is nearly always seen as defensive body language. When you do it, you're closed off and disengaged. You may appear angry or stubborn.
If you see someone holding this position, remember that it could indicate that the temperature where you are is too cold. It could also mean they're tired or simply supporting their shoulders in an armless chair.
2. Smile
Smiles can mean different things, depending on the exact facial expression. There are happy smiles, shy smiles, warm smiles, and ironic smiles. The Duchenne smile consists of pulling up the corners of your mouth while squeezing your eyes to make crow's feet. It's considered a genuine smile, as opposed to a fake smile where you just expose your teeth.
3. Tapping Your Fingers
When you tap your fingers, you appear impatient and possibly nervous about waiting.
4. Tilting Your Head to One Side
When you tilt your head to the side, it usually means you're listening intently and deeply interested in finding out the information you're being told. It can also mean you're concentrating very hard.
5. Steepling Your Fingers
Holding your fingertips together and your palms apart let people know you have authority and control. Bosses and politicians use this gesture often to show they're in charge.
6. Crossing Your Legs
The way you cross your legs can tell others a lot about you and how you're feeling at any given moment. If you cross them at the ankle, it may show that you're trying to hide something. If you cross them at the knee but point your knees away from the other person, you show you're uncomfortable with them. In most cases, the best option is to plant your feet firmly on the floor.
7. Pulling Your Ear
When you tug on your ear, it shows that you're trying to make a decision but just hasn't gotten there yet. You tend to look indecisive or noncommittal.
8. Putting Your Head In Your Hands
When you put your head in your hands, it might mean that you're bored, as if you're so weary of life that you just can't hold your head up anymore. Or, it can mean that you're upset or so ashamed you don't want to show your face.
9. Standing Up Straight
Standing erect with good posture shows you feel confident.
10. Gesturing with Your Hands Open and Palms Up
What you do with your hands makes a big difference in whether people trust you or not. Hold your hands open and gesture with your palms up to show that, no, you don't have anything hidden from them.
11. Eye Contact
You need to make eye contact with the person you're talking to if you want them to feel comfortable with the conversation and accept what you have to say. Scientists suggest that most people are comfortable with eye contact of about 3.2 seconds at a time if you're a stranger. When you become a friend, they usually don't mind having eye contact with you for longer at a time.
12. Looking Down
Looking at the floor or ground makes you appear weak and unconfident. Unless there's something you need to discuss down there, you need to keep your eyes on the level of the other person's face. When you break eye contact, as you should every few seconds, try looking to the side.
13. Rubbing Your Hands Together
Want to show how excited you are about a new project? Just rub your hands together vigorously.
14. Twisting Your Hair
Often, movies and TV shows use the gesture of twisting the hair to show flirting. That may be the meaning you get when someone twists their hair, especially if they look up at you through their lashes while they do it.
However, if you're in a job interview, you'll only look like your nervous and uncomfortable as you idly twist your hair.
15. Microexpressions
Microexpressions are extremely brief facial expressions that happen in about 1/25th of a second. They happen when you're trying to hold back your emotions. When you see someone showing a microexpression, it usually means that they're trying to conceal something from you. However, if you learn to spot them, you can gain the advantage in any type of interaction.
16. Walking Briskly
When you want to show your self-confidence, walk briskly and with purpose. Whether you're going somewhere specific or not, walk as if you're striding confidently toward an important destination.
17. Placing Your Hand On Your Cheek
When you touch your cheek with your hand, you show that you're thinking and carefully evaluating the information you're receiving. When you see someone do this while you're talking to them, you can usually assume that they're taking you seriously enough to consider what you're saying.
18. Rubbing Your Eye
When you rub your eye, it usually means you doubt or disbelieve what you're hearing. If you someone is rubbing their eye as you speak, you might benefit from stopping and asking for their feedback so that you can address their doubts.
19. Rubbing Or Touching Your Nose
When you rub or touch your nose, you appear dishonest. If you do it in a conversation that requires openness and honesty, you'll have trouble accomplishing your goals. And, if you see someone else rubbing their nose, it's a good indication that you need to be careful not to believe everything they tell you automatically.
20. Standing With Your Hands Clasped Behind Your Back
Take a position with your hands clasped behind your back, and others may read this as anger, apprehension, or frustration. It may feel like a nice, casual pose, but in reality, it can make others uncomfortable and wary of you.
1. Pinching The Bridge Of Your Nose
When you close your eyes and pinch the bridge of your nose, you seem to be making a negative evaluation of what's happening in the conversation. If someone takes this pose with you, you may need to take a different approach in enlisting their support for your goal.
22. Standing With Your Hands On Your Hips
This pose is tricky. In some cases, it can mean that you're feeling angry and may behave aggressively. In others, it may simply mean that you're enthusiastic and ready to get something done.
How To Send The Right Messages With Your Body Language
Learning body language examples is a great first step to sending the right body language messages. It also helps you read the unspoken messages others are sending to you.
However, knowing the right movements, gestures, and facial expressions can only take you so far. If you want to have healthy, productive interactions with others, you may need to work toward a better understanding of yourself and the people in your life.
Couples who misread each other's body language can quickly become angry at, disappointed in, or out of touch with each other.
Body language comes through most of the time whether you intend to reveal it or not. However, you need to be careful when assessing someone else's body language. What means one thing to one person might mean something entirely different to someone else.
Body Language Examples
The following body language examples are common. It's usually easy to discern their meaning once you've learned them.
1. Arms Crossed Across The Chest
Sitting or standing with your arms crossed across your chest is nearly always seen as defensive body language. When you do it, you're closed off and disengaged. You may appear angry or stubborn.
If you see someone holding this position, remember that it could indicate that the temperature where you are is too cold. It could also mean they're tired or simply supporting their shoulders in an armless chair.
2. Smile
Smiles can mean different things, depending on the exact facial expression. There are happy smiles, shy smiles, warm smiles, and ironic smiles. The Duchenne smile consists of pulling up the corners of your mouth while squeezing your eyes to make crow's feet. It's considered a genuine smile, as opposed to a fake smile where you just expose your teeth.
3. Tapping Your Fingers
When you tap your fingers, you appear impatient and possibly nervous about waiting.
4. Tilting Your Head to One Side
When you tilt your head to the side, it usually means you're listening intently and deeply interested in finding out the information you're being told. It can also mean you're concentrating very hard.
5. Steepling Your Fingers
Holding your fingertips together and your palms apart let people know you have authority and control. Bosses and politicians use this gesture often to show they're in charge.
6. Crossing Your Legs
The way you cross your legs can tell others a lot about you and how you're feeling at any given moment. If you cross them at the ankle, it may show that you're trying to hide something. If you cross them at the knee but point your knees away from the other person, you show you're uncomfortable with them. In most cases, the best option is to plant your feet firmly on the floor.
7. Pulling Your Ear
When you tug on your ear, it shows that you're trying to make a decision but just hasn't gotten there yet. You tend to look indecisive or noncommittal.
8. Putting Your Head In Your Hands
When you put your head in your hands, it might mean that you're bored, as if you're so weary of life that you just can't hold your head up anymore. Or, it can mean that you're upset or so ashamed you don't want to show your face.
9. Standing Up Straight
Standing erect with good posture shows you feel confident.
10. Gesturing with Your Hands Open and Palms Up
What you do with your hands makes a big difference in whether people trust you or not. Hold your hands open and gesture with your palms up to show that, no, you don't have anything hidden from them.
11. Eye Contact
You need to make eye contact with the person you're talking to if you want them to feel comfortable with the conversation and accept what you have to say. Scientists suggest that most people are comfortable with eye contact of about 3.2 seconds at a time if you're a stranger. When you become a friend, they usually don't mind having eye contact with you for longer at a time.
12. Looking Down
Looking at the floor or ground makes you appear weak and unconfident. Unless there's something you need to discuss down there, you need to keep your eyes on the level of the other person's face. When you break eye contact, as you should every few seconds, try looking to the side.
13. Rubbing Your Hands Together
Want to show how excited you are about a new project? Just rub your hands together vigorously.
14. Twisting Your Hair
Often, movies and TV shows use the gesture of twisting the hair to show flirting. That may be the meaning you get when someone twists their hair, especially if they look up at you through their lashes while they do it.
However, if you're in a job interview, you'll only look like your nervous and uncomfortable as you idly twist your hair.
15. Microexpressions
Microexpressions are extremely brief facial expressions that happen in about 1/25th of a second. They happen when you're trying to hold back your emotions. When you see someone showing a microexpression, it usually means that they're trying to conceal something from you. However, if you learn to spot them, you can gain the advantage in any type of interaction.
16. Walking Briskly
When you want to show your self-confidence, walk briskly and with purpose. Whether you're going somewhere specific or not, walk as if you're striding confidently toward an important destination.
17. Placing Your Hand On Your Cheek
When you touch your cheek with your hand, you show that you're thinking and carefully evaluating the information you're receiving. When you see someone do this while you're talking to them, you can usually assume that they're taking you seriously enough to consider what you're saying.
18. Rubbing Your Eye
When you rub your eye, it usually means you doubt or disbelieve what you're hearing. If you someone is rubbing their eye as you speak, you might benefit from stopping and asking for their feedback so that you can address their doubts.
19. Rubbing Or Touching Your Nose
When you rub or touch your nose, you appear dishonest. If you do it in a conversation that requires openness and honesty, you'll have trouble accomplishing your goals. And, if you see someone else rubbing their nose, it's a good indication that you need to be careful not to believe everything they tell you automatically.
20. Standing With Your Hands Clasped Behind Your Back
Take a position with your hands clasped behind your back, and others may read this as anger, apprehension, or frustration. It may feel like a nice, casual pose, but in reality, it can make others uncomfortable and wary of you.
1. Pinching The Bridge Of Your Nose
When you close your eyes and pinch the bridge of your nose, you seem to be making a negative evaluation of what's happening in the conversation. If someone takes this pose with you, you may need to take a different approach in enlisting their support for your goal.
22. Standing With Your Hands On Your Hips
This pose is tricky. In some cases, it can mean that you're feeling angry and may behave aggressively. In others, it may simply mean that you're enthusiastic and ready to get something done.
How To Send The Right Messages With Your Body Language
Learning body language examples is a great first step to sending the right body language messages. It also helps you read the unspoken messages others are sending to you.
However, knowing the right movements, gestures, and facial expressions can only take you so far. If you want to have healthy, productive interactions with others, you may need to work toward a better understanding of yourself and the people in your life.
Couples who misread each other's body language can quickly become angry at, disappointed in, or out of touch with each other.
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